In your daily life, you become a receiver, as well as a transmitter, of too many messages. How carefully do you treat these messages? Before tackling this question, look back to recognize some moments when you listened carefully. When were you present with your soul and body? How did you feel? How did you make others feel? How did this experience affect you?
However, there are so many messages that you receive, that it is literally impossible to listen to them all carefully, and this is completely understandable. Just as, when you go to a restaurant, you don't order the whole menu, but choose what you want to eat, so you choose what to pay attention to. By what process do you decide which messages to pay attention to? Consciously or "accidentally"?
They define the effect that attentive listening has on your life and on your relationships as a supreme virtue.
Why is attentive listening a virtue?
Shows compassion and empathy. When you listen attentively, you offer your interlocutor your full presence. You focus on what he says and his feelings, thereby creating a safe space for communication.
Shows Understanding. When you go beyond the context of simple listening, you enter the process of understanding the message of your interlocutor, including his deeper thoughts and feelings. This leads you to understanding him, which is vital to effective communication and relationship building.
Shows respect. When you listen carefully to your interlocutor, you show that you respect him and his experiences. He feels that what is important to him is also important to you, thus strengthening mutual trust.
Shows willingness to learn. When you listen carefully you give yourself the opportunity for new perspectives and new ways of thinking. You learn through the experiences and knowledge of others, and you also enrich your own perspective.
How can you develop attentive listening?
Minimizing distractions. When something really interests you and you want to listen carefully, turn off your phone. Make sure you are in a quiet place and focus solely on the sender of the message.
Don't interrupt. Give your interlocutor time to fully express himself. When you notice that he's widening, try to gently bring him back to the subject.
Ask clarifying questions. In this way you show your interlocutor that you are interested in what you hear, and you can get more details.
Maintain eye contact. By making eye contact, you show that you are engaged and genuinely interested in what your interlocutor is telling you.
By practicing Ai Chi. By practicing AI Chi in the water, you can reduce stress and connect your body with your mind. The balance of the mind and body combined with the calmness offered by the elimination of stress, will lead you to listen more attentively, ignoring the distractions of everyday life.
Ultimately the question is whether "careful listening is a supreme virtue?" Or maybe the question is, ¨how do you use this virtue in your everyday life?¨. As we saw above, this is a skill that can be cultivated. It's up to you to make the decision. Do you want to define how your life will develop or will you leave it to "fate"?